As I reminisce on this previously shared blog content (photos included in this article) of a few years ago, that recently popped out on my Facebook newsfeed as “memory post”, I come to realize how important it is to stay focused on your journey, no matter what the distractions might be and I thought I would share a little insight on the subject of… Dream killers.

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Now I could let these dream killers kill my self-esteem. Or use my arrogance as the steam to power my dreams… I ain’t play the hand I was dealt, I changed my cards, I prayed to the skies and I changed my stars”~ Kanye West, Last Call. 

Dream killers are the people in your life who don’t believe in you. They don’t think you can do things you vouched to do. They question the validity of your goals. They think you’re a “dreamer”.

Dream killers tend to highlight your missteps instead of acknowledging your accomplishments. Dreams killers are everywhere and usually, they are “your people”.  They are people you know very well and maybe, people you even count on.

When we take the random internet thug who doesn’t know you from a mile out of the picture, typical dream killers are often friends, or old friends, co-workers, and even family members. You know the people who kill your vibes and will never encourage you to take on a new challenge? The people who will tell you they love and wish you well, but are never happy or never there to support you when you’re actually doing something you like, that may lead to the success they wished you? These are dream killers. Learn to recognize them and be prepared, because you will, at some point in your life encounter them. Fear not, but be prepared, because they’re literally going to try to kill your dream.

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So what if you encounter any of these so-called dream killers? Just put your blinders on. Let them judge and say whatever they want, but don’t argue. Don’t try to convince them, because you will never succeed. Let it go in one ear and out the other. Your best revenge is to get to work, doing what your heart, dreams, and mind are set on! Let your actions speak louder than your words.

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Now here’s the ticker: Dream killers don’t necessary mean bad or ill. They are not necessarily people that don’t love you. Remember, they can be friends or family members, your mom, dad, or siblings. They are people that just “kill your vibes” whether it is deliberate or not.

They are the naysayers. Maybe they really don’t believe you can do it. Maybe they’re worried about you or scared for you. Maybe they couldn’t do it themselves; Maybe they can’t see a brighter future for themselves so ultimately they’re projecting their insecurities and failures onto you. Maybe they’re jealous or envious. Or maybe they just want to see you take a different path. Whether they mean to or not, they are still dream killers and you shouldn’t let them distract you from your purpose. Dream killers could be a distraction.

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“Starve your distractions and feed your focus!” Daniel Godeman

Distractions will come your way. They will come in many shapes and forms…  Be smart and alert. Learn to recognize them and most importantly, learn to starve them. Don’t let them entertain you. Stay focused and keep your eyes on the prize.

My blogging and entrepreneurship journey has been and still is full of distractions. Had I fed them or paid them any mind, I wouldn’t have made it this far. I still have a long way to go, and I’m not even near where I want to be, but I’m grateful for where I am.

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I know my paths are and will probably always be paved of dream killers, and I will not allow them to kill my vibe. I had people asked me: “Are you still doing that blogging thing?” Some would say “Wow… So, you didn’t quit, huh!? … Me to answer – Yes, I am still doing it; and I’m actually doing great and even more than just that… This is not me bragging. I’m simply stating that I know what I want and I claim it; and no dream killers will tell me otherwise!

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Have you ever wondered why strangers or people you barely know would support you more than your own folks? – I believe it’s quite simple. Sometimes, your own folks have a hard time accepting that you came from the same place as them; place where they’re still while they can clearly see you (by your mindset, thinking and actions) successfully growing out of and leaving behind.

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“Do you know why strangers support you more than your own folks? Your own folks have a hard time accepting that you came from the same place they’re still stuck in!” 

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You will hear and read that success is about hard work. Granted, it is! However, keep in mind that success has even more to do with  your mentality. Your mindset is the key. You got to have a strong mind if you want to succeed in anything in life. Whether it’s in your career, wheight loss, marriage… You’re going to have a strong mindset. What you allow to ruffle your feathers matters. The negative thoughts you allow to permeate your mind. The negative people you surround yourself with, who would discourage you and throw you off-course play a crucial role in your success story. Choose your “entourage” wisely and quickly eliminate any negative thoughts (and thing) that may endangered your success.

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Believe in yourself and your ability to make things happen. Trust your gut and follow your heart. Listen to your intuition. Work hard toward your goals and walk in your lane. Surround yourself with positive people – People that will build you up. People that support you and genuinely want the best for you. People who will scold you behind closed doors and deaf ears when you’re “acting up”, but will defend you out in the open when you’re being judged or wronged… because there has to be a balance.

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When you find these people, cherish them, because they are your tribe! What of the dream killers? Ignore them! Love them if you have to, but ignore them! Like who they are, not what they represent… Don’t let them take you off your path. Your career or success depends on it. Keep working hard and let your success speak for you. Maybe one day, just maybe… They will catch on and ask you how you did it… And as my better half says, “those who doubted you and said you cannot do it are still watching… Make sure to put on a good show!” 

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*Outfit post previously shared Here.

 

 

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In a previous post HERE, I waxed poetic on the subject of dream killers, and quickly covered the reasons behind some of the different types of dream killers. I mainly pointed out the “external” dream killers and a simple way to overcome them and move on with our vision… Need a quick reminder? You will find (below) an extract from the article on the Dream killers shared with you a few days ago.

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“So what if you encounter any of these so-called dream killers?
Just put your blinders on. Let them judge and say whatever they want, but don’t argue. Don’t try to convince them, because you will never succeed. Let it go in one ear and out the other. Your best revenge is to get to work, doing what your heart, dreams, and mind are set on! Let your actions speak louder than your words.”

See, that’s actually the easy part when dealing with dream killers… Anything we can see in the “physical” world, we can pretty much fight and vanquish. It’s not as easy though, when it comes to that inner voice that tells you in a very quiet yet resounding tone that “You cannot do it”. That inner voice that asks you: “What if you fail?” That inner voice that always tries to convince you that “So and so tried and failed; what makes you think that YOU can!?” – That same resounding inner voice that makes you believe that “It’s getting so tough… Are you really cut out for this!?”

Yes, our number one and most dangerous dream killer is ourself; more specifically, our thoughts. The negative and most doubtful ones! The ones that play the most frequently and the loudest in our mind and that are easily fueled by the discouraging words and actions of the naysayers…

Let’s face it, the tumultuous times, just like the negative and defeating thoughts are going to come at one point; especially when the going gets tough, when business slows down, or simply when we get rejections… This is the very moment to safeguard your mind! Only feed your mind positive, encouraging, and empowering thoughts! And do this especially when you’re by yourself… You know what they say, “when you’re with others, watch your words, but when you’re by yourself, watch your thoughts!”.

 

Many would agree that the overflowing thoughts we have just relate to the importance of the endeavor we’re taking on. However, this process should be a balance of both positive and negative thoughts… the Pro & Con though process… the “hope for the best and plan for the worst” thought process. Unfortunately, as mentioned earlier, the negative ones play the loudest and overpower the positive ones.

However, as far as I’m concerned, the solution is quite simple. The same way we would beat the external dream killers (by changing their negative words and actions into fuel and motivation), we need to change our mindset so that the negative thoughts are sent automatically to the back of our mind. The positive, encouraging, and empowering ones have to always come up on top. “Progress is impossible without change; and those who cannot change their mind cannot change anything!”

Let’s change our mind, so we can progress past our inner dream killers… and accomplish great things!

Let’s change our minds to “I’m well able”, “All I set out to do, I can and will do!”, “No one can understand my vision as much as me or better than me!”, “I am my greatest asset!”, “This is my dream; I believe it and I’ll see it to fruition!”

Inhale confidence… Exhale doubt! Think like a winner! BE A WINNER!

“The reflection you see in the mirror is an image and a reflection of God. Remember who you are! If you ever need assurance of who you are or what you are made of, go and look in the mirror!”

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5-reasons-why-i-love-monday TGIM friends, I hope you had a fantastic weekend and a great start to the week. I’ve heard countless times how “Mondays” suck; I actually love Monday. I don’t personally think it’s that bad, however I do see why most people don’t care for it and I’m sharing with you today my two cents on the matter.

monday-motivation-why-you-is-monday-prodcutive 1 – It’s just another day of the week.  See, this may sound cliché, but the truth is society makes a huge deal out of Monday being the day everybody dreads to see. I see how it can be daunting to see the day that precedes the fun and activity-filled days (weekend) as the “party pooper” if I can put it this way, because it’s a start of a work week; but for me, that’s just life and there’s always going to be a party pooper, and there’s always going to be a Monday. Lol. In fact I think of Monday as starting anew.

2- It’s a fresh new start. I love the chance of a new start. It gives me hope and strength to keep going and get things done or to get things right. Do you recall that feeling when it’s your birthday, when it’s the beginning of a new year, when the month is ending and we’re about to see another one? That feeling of a new start, new opportunities, new and more blessings…? That’s exactly how you should also feel when you think of Monday.

The excitement to put another ounce of work toward your goals, the purpose-driven attitude and eagerness to make things happen, the hope to get it right this time. These should be good enough reasons why you should love Mondays.

3- It’s another day to be grateful for. – Think of it this way: You are well and alive and some people are battling or fighting for their life at this very moment. Some, on the other hand, didn’t make it through Sunday to see this day. There’s a lot going in the world that we can’t even wrap our head around. Be grateful and thank the higher power, or the universe for the simple fact that you’re seeing another beautiful day. You know what, life is even more fun and rewarding when we count our blessings!

4- It’s the most productive day of the week. According to a study conducted by the staffing firm Accountemps, while some people will argue that Tuesday is the most productive day of the week, Monday would be considered the most productive day by a great percentage of human resources managers. Whether you’re working for yourself or for someone else, a productive day equal greater results and great feeling of accomplishment. Monday can be productive because most people tackle it with “The weekend is over, now back-to work” attitude! Many workers would spend their day trying to catch up on the previous week and plan the week ahead. I believe that when you hit your week with a great start, and plan out your week ahead, you will most likely not only have a productive day, but also a productive week.

5- “Do what you love to do and you will never work another day in your life”

Yes, this sentiment is an all-time constant. We’ve heard or read it somewhere; we even repeated it to our younger folks or adults peers in times of motivation or encouragement.  “Do what you love and you will never work another day in your life”.  If you love what you do and are passionate about it, it becomes your way of life, and you find a purpose in doing it.

Do you have a love or hate story with Mondays? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this!  Thanks for reading and have a wonderful start to the new week 🙂

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On August 1st of 2014, I braved all sentiments of fear and the unknown, mustered up my courage and hit “Publish” for the very first time on my blog. You can read all about it here. – It’s been a relatively long journey, but each year brought me closer to my dreams and goals.

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There were times when I asked myself the million dollars question: Is it all worth it? The challenges, the hard work, the investments, the critics, the No’s, the late night sleep, etc… and every time the answer was a resounding “Yes!”. So here I am, celebrating another milestone.

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If there’s one or maybe 2 things I will leave you with after reading this post, it’s to go after your dreams, no matter how hard, how little, or how ridiculous they seem. You will never know how far you can go if you give up or don’t give it a try.

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There will be naysayers (read this post), but their opinions aren’t your business; Or you could be your very own demise (Read this post)… That been said, Be good and true to yourself, know what you want, work for it, and be consistent.

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There’s no elevator to success, so yes you must do the work, whether it’s in the physical or the spiritual. Be prepared to do the work and most importantly, be prepared to face challenges. Oh and one more thing! Do not compare your journey to others’.

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We are all on different paths and divine assignments. It may take one year for you to get to where you want to be, but it could take 10 years to the other person. A lot goes into it; and each person’s definition of success is different.

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Be inspired by someone you like or whose journey you’re following. Heck! Reach out and ask for advice if you must, but remember that comparison is the thief of joy; and nothing good comes out of it.

Believe and do the work!

Cheers!🥂target-stripes-off-shouder-top

Top: similar , Similar  | Skirt: Previously styled here | Love this one!|  Shoes: Similar | Bag: Similar | Sunglasses: Similar.

Thanks for reading, 

Lots of love, 

Edwige 

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Hello beauties, 

The “Designer Spotlight” series is back and I’m very pleased to introduce to you a one of a kind, hardworking, and talented designer. Akofa Kagni is a young and charming lady from Togo (West Africa), residing in Los Angeles, CA.

Despite living in the US, Akofa makes constant trips to her birth-land to procure the materials and ensure that her customers are provided with the best and most trending fabrics from her motherland; fabrics which mainly constitute her urban African designs. Her products range from both men and women unique apparels to fabulous accessories. 

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One of the awesome things about blogging is the ability to introduce to my readers great products and services they may have never heard of before or anywhere else. This post isn’t sponsored in any way, but I had the opportunity to know and learn more about Akofa and her designs; and I just had to brag about her to the world! 🙂 I have nothing but great things to say about this young lady and her work; but don’t take my word for it. Check out some of her collections on her website . Not only is she a talented designer and entrepreneur, she’s also a philanthropist who essentially help fund the education of a group of young girls who also receive appropriate training in making some of the products she designs. How awesome is that!

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Model is wearing Akofa-Designs Products

In the mood for original, tribal, and exotic fabrics designs such as, Kente, Dashiki, or Ankara? Head over www.akofadesign.com to check out her collections! And while you’re there, feel free to tell her that I send you. You might just get the “sister-in-law discount” 🙂   

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Akofa wearing her own design, the “Kente Jumpsuit”

One of my foci as a blogger and content creator is to share inspirational and valuable information with you, my readers; information that improves or increases the value of your fabulous life! This being said, I hope bringing back this series where I showcase new and upcoming designers (or entrepreneurs) will contribute to adding value to your day and life while shining the spotlight onto them! – Oh and remember, when you support small business, you’re supporting a dream!

Lots of love, 

Edwige 

XOXO

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